Skip to main content

Downgrade. And some attempt at humor.

There is one proverb that I always liked. I even use it as my everyday motto:

"Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious".

I googled for it, and discovered a whole slueth of the things i liked and laughed to. Here's the list of sayings that I like, even if I don't agree with some of them.

"I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow's not looking good either." - typical for any IT involved person

"I love deadlines. I especially love the swooshing sound they make as they go flying by." - again i can use this almost every day

"Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?" - oh, Lordy! If i had 10 cents everytime i COULD say that.

"Someday we'll look back on this and plow into a parked car." - mmm, maybe not plow... but red light definitely.

"There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives."

"Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it."

"Accept that somedays you're the pigeon, and somedays you're the statue." - I actually perefer that dog - i prefer the dog and the fire hydrant analogy.

"I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem." - i'll just keep quiet on this one.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and
thought to myself - "Where the hell is the ceiling???"

"My reality check bounced." - every day

"On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key. "

"Don't meddle in the affairs of dragons, cuz, like, you're crunchy and taste good with ketchup."

"Everybody is somebody else's wierdo... " - true to the last period

"If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you." - it could be offending to some, but i find this funny.

"Never clean your room while your plane ticket is in it." - again, very true.

"When ideas fail, words become very handy." - i've seen that at the office too many times.

"The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant." - is this the election year?

"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." - a rule to live by for any programmer.

"There is always one more imbecile than you counted on." - that's my other motto, and one of Murphy's Law derivatives.

"It's only premarital sex if you're going to get married." - good observation.

"Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm."

"The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes." - ding ding

"Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense." - YES!

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students.

"Never put your finger where you wouldn't put your nose."

"There are two kinds of people in the world, those that think there are two kinds of people in the world, and those that know better." - sad really

"We occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of us pick ourselves up and hurry on as if nothing happened."

"If you can't learn to do something well, learn to enjoy doing it poorly."

"An agreeable person is someone who agrees with you." - the more people like that the better

"The wonder of a single snowflake outweighs the wisdom of a million meteorologists." - that should be posted on the cubicle of any weather-man/ woman in Chicago.

"When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water."

"You can't help the poor man by destroying the rich." - again somewhat related to the current elections.

"Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer." - mmmmmmmmmmmm, beer.

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach him to use the Net and he won't bother you for weeks."

"Wise man make proverbs but fools repeat them." - YES, I AM IN THE CLUB

Do you know any other profound proverbs?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

26.5 miles per gallon

Created by The Car Connection



Although i like the md-size sedans. Car of choice almost anytime.

Stolen from Jim

Comments

Ilya said…
I got 28.5 miles, same category as you. Don't feel like posting on my blog, though.

Good collection of proverbs - many to live by!
I am just not sure how the questions translate into the result. Miles per gallon of what. Chocolate? Then it would be too little. Alcohol? Then it would be too much. :) Cheese? I am not sure if that's even accountable, as the numbers go up astronomically.

Popular posts from this blog

Things you never cared to know about Mayonnaise

I have decided to start a new Rubric. Once a week I will write a post about a random subject. Having the subject coming out of MY head, it can be about anything. I constantly have a lot of random "Why?" and "How does?" questions floating around in my head. I will try to explain how I arrived to the subject at hand and promise to do diligent research on Wikipedia and provide you, the unfortunate reader, with either the interesting or unusual bits of info. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED! In addition to that I have a slight fetish for trivia. The rubric will be called: Things you never cared to know about Today's topic is Mayonnaise . How did I arrive to that? As I was making breakfast in the morning, I decided that I wanted to take a pita pocket and stuff it with something. The pitas are usually fairly dry, and you have to toast them. I did not have Hummus or Babaganoush (GOD! I just love saying BA-BA-GA-NOUSHHHHHHHHH!) I put a little Mayo inside to soften it up. So, ther...

Crazy ideas - UPDATED

Here's a crazy survey I thought off. If you had a time machine where would you travel first? Assuming the fact of course of universal invincibility. ----UPDATE---- As my brother mentioned, with time travel universally available getting rich schemes would be less than doable. My aim is more towards investigating great mysteries of history. Therefore: a. To the Big Bang b. To see an asteroid killing dinosaurs c. To see the exodus of Jews as it really happened d. Try to see if Jesus hubbub really happened e. Forget the past, I'd go to the year 2020 to see who winds World Series and place a bet accordingly. f. Suggested by Ilya . Back a day or to to purchase winning lottery ticket. e. Try to see if Atlantis existed. f. Travel to the future to see the explosion of our Sun. I am torn between the dinosaurs and the World Series. Please suggest the choices. Should I add Buddha and Muhammed to the list as well? From the curiousity stand-point. I still rather see the dinosaurs.

Weekend update

Finally some beautiful weather here in Chicago. We have decided to go to our regular hunting grounds at Lincoln Park Zoo. We slept well into the morning, picked up our good friends and in the company of four adults and three children went to see the animals. The photographer in me was screaming bloody murder to go out and make pictures. Thankfully my wife was very tolerant this time around with me running around like a madman taking picture of anything that moved. Lincoln Park Zoo is a great little place. It's free (if you don't consider $17 parking) they have all the animals kids love to see, and none of the animals where you stand scratching your head wondering how do you explain platipus to a 5-year-old. One bad thing that happened today, is I think i forgot to close the car, and somebody got in and stolen my Magellan GPS. Luckily nothing else was in the car, so other then that the car remained untouched. Unpleasant, but I have only myself to blame, and I think I'll live...